![]() jumping out of an oncoming vehicle’s path rather than pausing mid-crosswalk).īut when we’re riled up by frustration, anxiety, hanger (hunger plus anger), and other intense emotions, we may be more likely to hit “send” when we shouldn’t. It’s another to let them steer the important decisions in your life, says counselor and couples therapist Melody Li, LMFT.Įmotional reactions are designed to keep us from danger (e.g. It’s one thing to be in tune with your feelings. ![]() Tuning into - and accepting - hard-to-feel emotions like anxiety or dread also helps us feel more grounded, an essential component of making wise choices. cheating), clarifying them helps clue us in to who we are and what we need, Carmichael says. No matter how overblown our apprehensions (your boss might not have it in for you after all, nor is your S.O. We can also assess whether the threats we perceive are realistic ( this worksheet can help too). Lists can help us get in touch with our fears about what’s in store for us. Here are some examples: Should I leave this relationship or job? Should I apply to graduate school - and which one? Should I move in with my partner? ![]() “We’re less likely to feel secure with our choices when we haven’t resolved our own internal conflicts about them,” Carmichael says.Ĭarmichael recommends making a pro and con list about big decisions. Our instincts aren’t always on target, but if you’ve got a funny feeling about a request someone’s made or the risks inherent in embracing a new opportunity, process these feelings before proceeding, says Chloe Carmichael, PhD, a clinical psychologist.
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